Short post on my hearing aids

The irony of getting hearing aids is if I didn’t need to be able to understand speech, I wouldn’t even need hearing aids. This was hammered home as I tried to get to sleep last night, because I could hear all three noises made by the clocks in the bedroom, and the sounds of the dripping faucet in the bathroom adjoining the Master Suite of Casa de El Poeta. Seriously, I could hear every coyote, neighborhood dog, trash panda, and the opossum going by the bedroom window. I can hear cars on the freeway more than 5 miles away, as well as the tollway that gets within 2 miles. If it wasn’t for the noise in my head from the brain damage I would have the hearing of a teenager who had never been to a rock concert, because my healing factor is that awesome. I heard phones ringing in the business adjacent to the sound proof room I took my hearing test in, and there were no walls on that room that were on the outside wall of the office. Below 4KHz my hearing is perfect which made adjusting the equalizer in the hearing aids “interesting”. I mean most people who need amplification need it from 1KHz on up, meaning I’m losing 3 or more channels on the equalizer because I don’t have any loss in that band.

This is so annoying because I just want Mrs. the Poet to stop mumbling, when she’s just talking normally. So I need some help, but not much help. And it annoys the piss out of me that I need help. Like seriously annoyed. And it also annoys me that I can’t heal brain and nerve damage like I can other things like skin and muscles. What good is it to be the closest thing IRL to Deadpool and Wolverine if brain damage is outside my abilities? It’s like “You’re going to live forever, but gradually get more and more stupid as you get older.” Something else to get annoyed at.

And that pretty much covers everything I wanted to say, so rather than ramble on, this is auf wiedersehen.

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