Tag Archives: physical affection

I can’t do what I need to do for my happiness, what do I do?

I’m in a quandary. I need physical contact including hugs and kisses, but don’t have access to people who want to have physical contact. As you might imagine, this causes me problems. I need physical contact on the regular, and right now I’m at one for 2021 and not looking any better for 2022.

I try to sublimate my need for physical affection by massage, but TBH that is a poor substitute for the exchange of physical affection. It’s better than nothing, but that’s not saying much. Ramen noodles are better than nothing but living on just the noodles long-term will result in malnutrition, and substituting massage for acts of physical affection will result in the emotional equivalent of malnutrition. And the causes of both are pretty much the same, one is the inability to buy and prepare nutritious food, the other is the inability to find or hire someone willing to provide the kind of physical affection that maintains sanity. Money cures many forms of insufficiency.

And this is kinda short but the post is degenerating into a pity party and nobody wants that.

Am I allowed to be angry?

On the one hand I’m a white cishet male, with all the advantages that entails. On the other hand it has been almost 10 months since I had “that kind” of contact with a person of my desired gender in spite of actually sleeping with one in the same bed, that I paid for, in a house that I paid off, and that I pay the taxes and insurance for every year. And I don’t have the budget to pay someone to get “that kind” of physical contact.

So, am I allowed to be angry? I don’t get any free, can’t buy any, so basically don’t get any at all. On top of that things hurt all the time, which I think is related to the previously stated problem.